OUR FATHER’S PERSISTENT LOVE MINISTRIES
“AN OUTSIDE PERSPECTIVE”
My Dear Family in Christ,
Ever precious greetings in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ! It is my great honor and privilege to share my heart with you once again. Over the years, I have always worked with my hands. At 15, I began working at the authoritative “request” of my father. Unbeknownst to me, he was teaching me work ethic. The root of the ethical lesson was this: if you want to eat out of my refrigerator, then you are going to work. Not only did he tell me I was going to work, but he got me a job! I just woke up one day, and he said, “Get ready, you are going to work.” Thus, I began to work with my hands.
Still in high school, it was full-time, summer work; then during the school year, I worked weekends and after school. At the same time, my nefarious slavery to satan via mind-altering substances had also begun. It was all deceptively cloaked in innocent fun. On top of that, I was also learning to play the guitar – all with my hands.
I was in construction, and it was soon discovered that I had no fear of heights. Therefore, my boss (seeing a pot of gold under the rainbow) quickly trained me as a steeplejack. That became my specialty, and I mastered it. A steeplejack specializes in high altitude work only – anything you can’t reach with a ladder. I learned how to sandblast, power wash, and paint the outside of water/gas tanks and high-rise buildings. I hung off the outside of 100-foot tanks in a bosun’s chair and made tons of loot in the process – all with my hands!
My drug use rapidly escalated, yet I was still functional in my work skills. I made lots of money because of my unique skill set. Sadly though, I had no financial ethics! Still always working with my hands, 20 years later, I crashed and burned at the bottom of the rabbit hole of sin. I had grievously taken a life and was now in prison with a 30-year, mandatory-minimum sentence. Sovereignly, in the desperation of my sin and by triumph of God’s mercy, the Lord Jesus Christ came and saved me. I soon began to play guitar for the Christian choir. In time, the Lord allowed me to become the gardener of Rahway. I worked eight-hour days pruning by hand. I did that for about 15 years while playing the guitar to boot. Eventually, I noticed my fingers were losing their feeling. I really didn’t know what was happening. I had to work because despite everything, thanks to dad, I still had a work ethic. Ultimately, my hands became so bad that I couldn’t feel my fingers anymore, and I had to stop playing my guitar. There is no remedy in prison. Motrin is their lot for everything. For years, I was suffering and just trying to joyfully “push through,” without murmuring, to make it out.
Finally, having served my time, I was released. Broke spiritually and financially, I immediately went to work as a landscaper for my brother and friend, Scotty. I was 64 years old working 10- hour days in the dead of summer with weed wacker and leaf blower in hand. At this point, I was so used to not having feeling in my fingers that I began to think it was normal. Truthfully, I was so happy to be out and finally courting my Deborah Ann that I would have done it all standing on my head if called to do so!
Eventually, my hands began to feel as if they were on fire, waking me up three or four times nightly. Finally, I went to the doctor and was told I had a very bad case of carpal tunnel syndrome. As such, I had surgery on both my hands (one at a time, of course). The right hand went very well, and after six weeks, most of the feeling came back and the burning was gone. It was awesome. I had followed the doctor’s instructions precisely. The left hand – not so. The doctor had ordered me not to use my hand, but we were getting our attic fixed, and in my pride, I felt like I had to help. While helping the attic workers, I popped the stitches. . .
Disobedience, as I was so painfully reminded, has consequences. I had willfully gone against the doctor’s command. I just assumed, without any real thought, that I knew better than the doctor. Thus, I suffered severely, in deep pain, every single day. I went back to the doctor, and he wasn’t able to restitch it because of the circumstances that I had brought upon myself. He told me, “It will be alright. It will now just have to heal from the inside out; it will just take some time.” I was a mess. Of course, you never realize how much you use your hands until you can’t use your hands! I was crippled unnecessarily for a season because of my unsubmissive, disobedient pride. I have been saved for 34 years now! Have I learned nothing yet in my walk? 😌
It is written, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.” (Psalm 103:1)
I know, I know, we all learn that verse when we first get saved. We highlight it with great joy. We memorize it, and maybe we even put it on our refrigerator. But have we really thought it through? What is it that the Lord desires us to learn in our work ethic? It’s a command you know, not a suggestion. How do we not “lean on our own understanding”? How do we flesh that out daily?
Once saved, we begin working for the Lord at the authoritative “request” of our heavenly Father. He is only pleased by our faith, even the fullness of our trust. As with my doctor, we need to follow the Lord’s instructions precisely and not lean on our own understanding. Contrarily, disobedience is satan’s fare; he finds his stronghold in us when we trust (lean) in our own way of thinking.
Perhaps, you need to be reminded that disobedience has consequences. Have you willfully gone against the Lord’s command? When we disobey, we assume, without any real thought, that we know better than the Lord. Perhaps you are suffering severely, in deep pain, every single day. Maybe you’ve gone to the Lord, but He’s not willing to restitch you because of the circumstances you have brought upon yourself? Are you a mess? Are you losing the feelings in your hands? Maybe you don’t know what is happening. Of course, we never realize how much we use our hands to serve until we can’t use our hands to serve. Are you unnecessarily crippled for a season because of an unsubmissive, disobedient heart? Weary one – come to the well and drink – He is Living Water!
Hear the Lord today, beloved, “Come to Me, all you who are weary…” (Matthew 11:28). It will be alright. You will now just have to heal from the “inside out,” it will just take some time. How many years have you been saved? And. . .
“HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING YET IN YOUR WALK?”
JOYFULLY IN JESUS,
LOVE, PHILIP
“REMEMBER THOSE IN PRISON AS IF CHAINED TO THEM.”
