My Dear Family in Christ,
Ever precious greetings in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ! It is my great honor and privilege to share my heart with you once again. It was a wonderfully brutal 30 years. The Lord did His work. He broke me. Willingly, I now deny myself while carrying my beloved cross even as I daily kiss the Rod that smote me.
When I was in prison, I had a warden over me whose name was Guy. The buck stopped with him. He and I knew of each other, and over the course of time, we had a few minor head-butts (perspective issues over how choir matters were to be fleshed out). We were each doing our best to fulfil God’s role for us in the prison system. In the process of time, I was released and Guy got another job. Upon my release, I was found living at U-Turn for Christ in Freehold. I was getting my life together, for me, in a new tech-crazed world. Most blessedly, I was also joyfully courting the angelic Deborah Ann.
At U-Turn, they had a Friday night men’s study. Much to my surprise, as I quietly observed the workings thereof, Guy was regularly present. We kinda circled each other like two bull elk in a feld, wily-like, each trying to discern if the other was who we thought he was. Finally, we deemed it so. Eventually, we shook hands with no fanfare, still not quite sure of each other. Not too long after that, Debbie and I were visiting New Life Church, the Spanish arm of our home church. As soon as Debbie and I walked in, there was Guy with his beautiful, Peruvian wife Judith. Again, we greeted each other awkwardly, yet politely, and chatted a bit. Discernment whispered, “The Lord is doing something here. . .”
Through the process of time, we seemed to run into each other everywhere. Men’s groups, church, etc. Debbie began chatting often with Judith. After circling each other for a while, Guy and I fnally began to talk casually, and lo and behold, we had a lot in common! Quizzically, we started to like each other. What the heck? Was this cops and robbers 101 – à la the Lord? We both had 30 years in prison, just from diferent sides of the proverbial wall. Soon, we shared our hearts and testimonies. Quickly, we acknowledged our brotherhood in Christ, knowing intuitively that friendship was in the wings. Not long after, I was asked to preach at New Life Church on a Sunday morning. Sovereignly, Judith was to be my interpreter! The Lord was doing something here. . .
This only fostered deeper fellowship for Debbie and Judith as they were knit together by the Lord. Not long after, Judith discovered that Debbie was a Certified Biblical Counselor, not to mention she has practical Kingdom smarts from just walking with the Lord for more than 50 years. Judith was personally seeking to grow in grace and in the knowledge of her Lord Jesus Christ, thus, she and Debbie fit together hand in glove. It came to pass, as was the Lord’s want, that Guy and I also began to meet regularly, seeking the Lord in His Word. The Lord was indeed doing something here – in all four of us. . .
In the meantime, Debbie and I were “all in” at the Hudson County Correctional Facility. We had been going in there for a long time on what are called “day passes” – but without permanent badges. Finally, at the jail’s request, the time had come for our background checks! I thought, “Oy vey! Of a truth, this could be a situation!” It’s mandatory to acquire a permanent badge. We knew, as a freight train, this was coming down the tracks. By faith, we also knew clearly that the Lord wanted us in that jail; for up to that very moment, I had been given much grace, even free rein of the whole jail, and in light of my infamous, nefarious past – that in itself was a monstrous miracle!
Of course, on the wings of grace, the beloved Debbie passed her background check with fying colors. Honestly, how could they deny an angel? 😇 In turn, I was taken down denial, and it ain’t no river in Egypt! Humble pie is manna for the broken; I eat it joyfully, knowing it is hand-baked of the Lord. Yes, due to my questionable past, I was not allowed in the jail any longer. Much to his delight, my jail rein was over – or so thought the devil! It was an extremely discouraging moment for me. Leaning on my own understanding, at the request of the Chaplain, I sent tons of reference letters to the jail. Plus, I asked my now very good friend, Guy, to write a letter for me. Unbeknownst to me, he knew the warden personally. He casually picked up the phone, called her, and in a couple of hours I was a permanent volunteer!! He had a juice card that I knew not of! One call from Guy and – boom – at his word, I was in!! It had nothing to do with me. I would have never gotten in on my own! By grace, the Lord used Guy mightily. He stood in the gap!
It is written, “Thomas saith unto Him, Lord, we know not whither thou goest; and how can we know the way? Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by Me.” (John 14:5-6)
Beloved, of such is the Kingdom of Heaven. Has the Lord done His work in you? Are you broken yet? The Lord is working through the process of time in your life as well. His sovereignty rules over all. Maybe you do not yet know Christ as Savior from your sins. Perhaps the two of you have been circling each other, as He calls you, like two bull elk in a feld. The Father so loves you that He has woven Christ into your life. He’s speaking to you through me. Indeed, your discernment whispers to you now, “Go to Him.” As He calls you by His Spirit, you will run into Him everywhere you go. Won’t you come to Him today? Make no mistake, this is the real cops and robbers 101 – à la the Lord! You are the most sinful of robbers, and Christ is the most holy, Heavenly Cop. You may have had some minor head-butts with Jesus in the past, but now in love, His desire is toward you – to arrest you (save you) eternally from your sinful self.
Quizzically, have you been going to church for a long time on a “day pass” without your permanent badge? Showing your permanent badge is, as a freight train, coming down the tracks! On your own, in light of your sinful past, you’ll never get to Heaven! Oy vey! Of a truth, you do have a situation! If you do not know the Warden (the Lord Jesus), you will be taken down denial, and it ain’t no river in Egypt! Hell is a real place – people are there now. Jesus’ blood is the juice card you know not of. You can never get in on your own; but, one call from Him and – boom – at His Word, you are in!! Christ Jesus is the Son of God; He became fesh, lived holy, was crucifed, died, and was buried. He rose from the dead on the third day for the forgiveness of sins. . .the just for the unjust, that He might bring us to God. Jesus stood in the gap for sinners by bearing their sin so they could have a. . .
“PERMANENT HEAVENLY BADGE!”
JOYFULLY IN JESUS,
LOVE, PHILIP
“REMEMBER THOSE IN PRISON AS IF CHAINED TO THEM.”
